Every year, Valentine’s Day arrives with its flowers, its messages, its silent expectations.

A word hoped for.

A gesture awaited.

A proof sought.

As if love had to come from outside to confirm that we have value.

But what if this day was not meant to look at the other…

but to look at ourselves?

We believe we suffer because love is missing.

In reality, we suffer because we ask another to fill what we have not learned to give ourselves.

We wait for them to:

  • soothe our fears
  • reassure our insecurities
  • repair our fragile self-esteem
  • confirm that we are worthy of being loved

And without realizing it, the relationship stops being a space of sharing…

and becomes a space of compensation.

Valentine’s Day, in its depth, is not a celebration of the couple.

It is a mirror.

A mirror that asks a simple and uncomfortable question:

How do I treat myself when no one is watching?

Am I harsh with myself?

Demanding?

Constantly judging myself?

Always trying to be “enough” to deserve love?

And then we are surprised to attract relationships that reflect this same harshness.

For the way we love another

is always a reflection of how we treat ourselves in silence.

Love is not something we find.

It is a state we return to.

We return to it when we stop running from our shadow.

When we stop playing a role to be acceptable.

When we allow ourselves to exist without conditions.

At that moment, something shifts.

We no longer seek someone to complete us.

We seek someone with whom to share what we already are.

We no longer fear loss as before,

because we no longer place our worth in someone else’s hands.

We no longer demand love.

We radiate it.

Valentine’s Day is not a performance.

It is an inner check-in.

Am I able to speak to myself with gentleness?

To respect my boundaries?

To honor my needs?

The one who knows how to welcome themselves

does not enter a relationship to take.

They enter to give.

They do not love from lack.

They love from abundance.

And when love is born from abundance,

it is no longer a reaction to fear,

but a conscious act.

That is the love that does not depend on a date.

That is the love that lasts.